Let’s educate ourselves. A potentially dangerous topic, but I think much good could also come from it. So, this is a pondering that will hopefully be fueled by all of you. We all make mistakes, and life generally throws such mistakes in our face. So, we’ll try to keep this as nice as possible. Of course, this will also double as a forum for venting – so really, as long as we keep personal attacks out of it, I’m good.Sensitivity – is this an issue you think about? Do you know someone who asks really awkward questions? I’m not talking about the once in a blue moon foot in mouth situation. I mean the person who makes at least three people uncomfortable each day.
A friend recently sent me this article. It’s a fun column in general, but this week what I’m going to direct your attention to would be the third question. It might not seem like a big deal, but think – have you ever asked someone “what are you?” – or how you would feel if someone asked you that? My personal favorite answer I’ve heard is “A human.” But I suppose that would be just as rude as the question. (Does a rude question excuse a subsequent rude response?)
Now I’m not saying this is something you should never ask. If you’re talking about diversity, personal experiences, or the other person mentions “back home” or some other sort of lead in – go for it and ask. You could learn some great things. I’m pretty sure I’ve asked it myself. But I’ve never done it within 5 minutes of meeting someone.
| Something else I recently saw online was an ethnic label attached to something medical, and it simply grated on me. This has also been on my mind, because I recently saw a commercial that I found rather unnecessary. H5N1 is something I’ve been following off and on for more than five years now. H5N1 is Avian Influenza, better known as Bird Flu. The BBC has had a page on it for something like forever. Those of us in the west have been safe thus far, though governments are somewhat prepared. There was an uproar when the US government spent millions of dollars on a vaccine about three years ago. Also, there have been some more recent developments, trying back to a sad event in Spain’s history. A friend of mine was 100% adamant last summer that humans could not get bird flu. Hopefully it never becomes an issue (or a greater one) for him or any of us. |  |
So, I’ll leave you with that commercial I saw. What do you think? Educational, or scare tactic? (I’m ok with the “you need to be aware” intention behind it – but… geez. What’s with commercials these days? Like the missing child cum battery one.)
But back to the main point – what is something people might not encounter in their every day lives that you think they should know about, or would like them to get right when they talk about it? Major or minor, I’d love to hear it.
the commercial? Scare tactic, absolutely. Why scare us with something that MAY happen. I’m all for being prepared, but wow, that commercial was a little much for something that may or may not happen.
Regarding the “what are you?” question. Wha?! That is phrased horribly. Where I live there is a large Hispanic population. I don’t just assume person of Hispanic descent is from Mexico or Puerto Rico. Most were born here. My parents best friend when I was growing up was Hispanic (Arturo). He was born in America but they primarily spoke Spanish in the home. So, he spoke English with an accent. He was constantly asked when he moved here from Mexico. He would reply that he was born in Texas. He would get this look like he was lying. Ugh.
Personally, because of my experience with Arturo as a child, I don’t ask anyone that unless it comes up in conversation. For example, I was talking to my son’s best friend’s mom at the Kindergarten Graduation this year (yeah, that’s as cute as it sounds!). The boys will be in 1st grade together and are so happy. I had just met her and we were planning for some playdates this summer. She mentioned they would be gone for 6 weeks in Bulgaria visiting her parents. That is an appropriate place to ask “did you grow up in Bulgaria” or something like that. So I did. We had a great conversation about her coming here for college, meeting A’s dad, getting married, etc etc. However, when I heard her very slight accent (she barely has an accent, I hardly noticed it) I didn’t immediately ask “where are you from?” It just wasn’t the right time.
okay, I’m getting off this soapbox now LOL
Tracy – I agree. I find that commercial… ridiculous. 😛 And think they should be spending money on getting vaccines, etc, not trying to scare the shit out of people.
And… yes – people can be really insensitive. I like to think they just don’t realize it, but I thought it’d be nice to bring to people’s attention. As for your friend, that’s so neat! (And exactly what I was talking about for a “good time” to bring it up.) And how adorable that your little boys will be in 1st grade together! Awwweee.
Wow……….should we evacuate Ohio now? 😀
Abso-freaking-lutely! I’ve heard the “What are you?” question….coupled with the school forms that ask for your race which also fry my ass. I check all that apply–stupid! LOL
I usually don’t ask and try not to assume–almost all of my children’s friends are mixed. As are my children.
Funny enough the one thing that irritates me is when people speak Spanish to me. That and the fact that we live in a world where people think it’s okay to stick their head out the window of a pickup and yell racial slurs 🙁 bastids!
OMG Hello #2 son is ADD and he’s all about no tact but we’re working on it!
Amie – It really makes me wonder about Ohio. Haha, and I can just see you writing that in an “other” space for forms. For some reason the forms don’t really bother me, but I have some friends who get really peeved when they see it.
As for your son, awe- at least he’s little and it’s more ok (as long as you’re working on it). As for yelling out of trucks… that’s something I have never, ever understood. Racial slurs, attempted pick ups… what’s the point?
You folks will particularly appreciate this post:
http://orbyn.blogspot.com/2008/08/beige-conversation.html
Way funny and totally on-topic.
Gwen, I love it – she’s a tough cookie. And oh, to be an observer of that conversation. LOL. 😀 Thanks!
GWEN! that’s hysterical! And oh so true. People can just boggle the mind sometimes.
Limecello…i guess it bothers me more (maybe) because I’m adopted (and grew up in a family where I looked like NOONE). If you want to know what I am, gimme my fricken records. (Srsly I do know at least half (now) but didn’t for many years).
Yes i has issues *g*
Amie – I understand – at least partly, I think. That must have been rough. Sometimes, I just don’t understand people and what they’re thinking. Or, what may be more apt, is what they aren’t thinking.
Amie – Somehow I fatfingered your comment about Orbyn’s other post on her site “The Tao of Beige” and it went off into the ether. Apologies.
Yes, I agree. This woman has a wicked, wicked sense of humor and entertains me greatly. I love her style.
Gwen…..no biggie. I added her to my google-reader
Lim, can I call you Lim? People are weird. We all are I think….I’m not all beat up over it. It is what it is–si? But yes the stupidity of bipeds is often mind-boggling!
Amie – Haha, sure. That’s actually ironically apt. I’m picking up nicknames left and right! Love it 😀
Yeah… about people… I want to hide at home all weekend, but I have to go out because of horrible events and dinners and training etc… and I’m just not looking forward to finding out new ways I can be surprised at how dumb people can be. Pft.