How to drive a cover model ’round the bend, in ten easy steps…

Written by Gwen - April 21, 2008 at 2:38 pm

Hi folks - haven't been around a lot the last couple of weeks due to a work project.  But I just couldn't pass this one up...

After I read Lynne Connolly's report from RT about the cover model who Lost It, I wondered how does a cover model go about losing it, and is there anything we can do to help them along.  I came up with the following list.  Please feel free to add to it.  Or criticize me for being an insensitive witch.  I'm surprisingly okay with either reaction.  ;-)  Gwen's icon

How to Drive a Cover Model Insane, in ten easy steps...

10. Replace their baby oil with WD40 and then ask them to sit on a hard chair.  That might be kind of fun actually...

9. Replace all the mirrors at a shoot with fun-house mirrors.

8. Put Ben-Gay in their thong/jock and then make then stand still for three hours during a photo shoot.

7. Tell them they have to pose with this woman.

6. Replace their hair gel with the stuff used in There's Something About Mary (yes I know what it was).

5. Tell them they're actually Fabio's love child with this woman.

4. Tell them their next Harlequin "guys & daughters" photoshoot is with this little girl.

3. Tell them the trend is hairy men, right after a full-body wax.

2. Tell them Nathan Kamp got all of the cover model jobs left.  Oh wait...

and the #1 way to make a cover model Lose It...

1. Don't give the Mr. Romance award to them!

Any of you have some ideas on how best to drive a cover model insane?  Comment here and share the giggle.

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Written by Gwen · Filed Under Ponderings 

Comments

9 Responses to “How to drive a cover model ’round the bend, in ten easy steps…”

  1. Sybil on April 21st, 2008 3:03 pm

    OMG I can't believe you! How could you?

    That would be insensitive whore... derr... work is fring your brain.

  2. Gwen on April 21st, 2008 3:05 pm

    Let's hope it doesn't. I need the job.

  3. Sybil on April 21st, 2008 3:10 pm

    If a smartass remark needs to be said I gots it covered.

  4. Gwen on April 21st, 2008 6:05 pm

    Holy crap. This is way funny - read the comments over on this post at the Smart Bitches.

  5. limecello on April 21st, 2008 9:39 pm

    ... I ... yeah.

  6. sharmi on April 22nd, 2008 7:27 am

    Tell him he has to take an IQ test and he does not pass if his score is less than two digits...

  7. Sybil on April 22nd, 2008 10:22 am

    Speaking of Cover Models....

    I will put this in a post but this seems to fit here too ;)


    Rebels of Romance Video Blog Day 4 from the Romantic Times Convention from Miss Media Productions on Vimeo.

  8. Devon on April 22nd, 2008 4:55 pm

    Am I mean for finding this hilarious? Love the woman in 7.

  9. The Romantic Times Convention, Day 4, Part III (In which The Rebels of Romance become ROCKSTARS!) « The Rebels of Romance on June 30th, 2008 12:57 pm

    [...] yet? Before reading on, I’ll give you one more link. The incredibly wicked Sybil’s How to Drive a Cover Model Round the Bend in Ten Easy Steps. Not that I’m advocating this, mind you. I’m just pointing our her wickedness for all the world [...]

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