1. You post full reviews, edit out all the bad parts, and do not show it was edited (…).
2. You don’t HAVE rabid fangrrls – you create them and play them yourself on the net tv.
3. You vote for yourself in contests, repeatedly.
4. You bitch about other authors who are successful in your genre and why they shouldn’t be, under another dishy name then make it worse by later doing it as yourself.
5. You report bad reviews to amazon as inappropriate.
6. You recommend yourself to other readers pretending to be other readers.
7. You bitch online about other authors bad behavior, while you are doing it too.
8. You repeatedly say you don’t mind bad reviews while explaining why the bad reviews aren’t right.
9. Your fans know more about your sex life than your characters.
10. There is only one author in romanceland that gets history right, and it just happens to be you.
I think as authors, readers, fan’s, reviewers, publishers, authors, editors, bloggers and fangrrls (even those who hit this post looking for pRon) we should be able to laugh at ourselves and the really stupid shit we do. But some of these things aren’t just stupid, some of them are just lying. And some of them are true, some I just made up and pulled out of uh, the air.
If you see yourself in anything listed, you might want to stop, drop and think.
And as always if you see anything here that you thinks is peachy keen, post and tell me why. I loved to hear other opinions. And yes fake emails can be put in when you post but something must be there to help with the spam. Which I am now getting over 100 a day of. Joy.
11. You and your author friends form a semi-anonymous review site and give yourselves shiny graphics and Best Book Evah Awards.
Makes me wonder how all these authors find the time to actually write a book Or at least a good book. 😉
I hate the lying. I hate the pretending to be 5 people to make you look like you are really popular.
Maybe if you’re your own readers and reviewers, the book doesn’t need to be good?
And, Jaci, since you won’t become a review site and give me lots of awards nobody’s ever heard of, I might have to rethink our friendship.
Did Jane email you about a certain someone, by any chance, Sybil?
I love this!
It’s kind of funny but when I prep clients for depositions, I always tell them that they must tell the truth because a lie will always be found out and it never works in your favor.
you know… thinking about it…. there is an author I can think of for every number…
go figure
Oh oh oh I know what site you are talking about shan, I hadn’t seen the awards though. That is so sad.
Can someone kindly send me the link to that site? I have to see this!
What’s even more ironic is that many of these authors are published by the same house. Weirdness, that.
nope…. not 10
I am just guessing mind you may, I am not shannon nor do I play her on tv.
But if I were gonna guess… I would look in the category Sock and go to a post called There is Something Said for Trying to Hard.
But that is just a random ass guess.
Nope. Scary thought, but…different one.
LOL Nothing like a good dose of Diva ego! As my son says…some things just get real old real quick. Readers get tired of the “I’m the great and perfect writer trip.” So do editors.
Say what? What’s the site? I wanna peep!
man, she’s talking about me again…
;p
LOL shi… wonder how many people out there are really thinking that?
Number 9 makes me queasy.
OH MY GOD I’ve done all of these!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hee. Okay, maybe not, because I’ve got some smarts left.
But what have I done? Oh oh! I bought a copy of Hot Spell once on Amazon, just to see what happened to the ranking. (It went up about 35,000 points, which means I’m way awesome.)
Oh oh! and I autographed a book to myself once — “To Mick, you’re my bestest friend evah, and the greatest writer!! Love, Meljean”
That was cool. I felt very speshul afterwards.
Forstly Syb, I can’t copy and paste, well at least I can’t copy, I don’t know why though.
Soooooo, what did I miss while I’ve had my head up my arse? E-mail me and tell me who you’re talking about ASAP, the possibilities are endless!
Erm, that would be ‘firstly’.
Is that like frosty the sybil? I am a texan we don’t do snow ;).
ohhhhhhhhhhhhh
you can’t copy and paste here… JANE!!!+
Oh oh! and I autographed a book to myself once — “To Mick, you’re my bestest friend evah, and the greatest writer!! Love, Meljeanâ€
THAT is the funnest shit evah and oddly not surprising. And yet, I don’t have a signed copy of shit from you. How wrong is that?