The Model Contest: Romance Style…
by Lynne Connolly

And so to the final full day. The book signing day! I’m not signing at the big fair this year, so I had a wonderful time wandering around the packed ballroom and talking to some of my heroines, squeeing at the likes of Mary Jo Putney and Pat Rice, and buying books. Just what I need. All those romance authors in one room, and they all got on like crazy, lots of chatting and hugging. Women together are real bitches. So not.

Last night I was inveigled into helping with the Lotus Circle tarot readings. I’d brought two packs with me, my old Rider pack and a new French deck I’m working with. I left the Thoth pack at home. They’re one of the original 12 test decks printed when the Crowley Thoth deck was first considered for use, instead of the book where they’d resided for fifty years. They are not easy to read, so I use them for in depth work, and there is no way they would work properly here. But we raised a good amount of money for a worthy cause and we’re doing it again on Sunday.

I did lose my voice, though, shouting above all the squealing and screaming. I can’t tell you about the cover model dinner, because I didn’t go. Not my thing, really and I wasn’t particularly hungry, even for beefcake. So Fabio and Adrian Paul came and went without me. The poor dears. Then I suppose I should talk about Mr. Romance (sigh, stifled yawn!) The contestants worked really hard all week, garnering votes and being generally nice chaps.

The contest was its usually cheesy self, hugely enjoyable and squirmy (though not necessarily in a good way). When the guys lined up in their smart casuals at the end I had a revelation. Buy some Armani or Hugo Boss, guys. A good suit can make a man, and you will, I promise, look even more gorgeous. Last year’s winner, Jason Santiago was as gracious as any contestant in a beauty contest (what, did you think it was their personalities we were whooping at?) and yes, he wore a good suit that smoothed over his nice abundant curves. John Fish won two awards, nice piece of beefcake that he is, and the two runners up to the main prize were James Gaskin and Fred Williams, both oozing sex appeal and baby oil. The winner was Chris Winters. He is going to look stunning on the cover of a Shomi book, you mark my words.

Later, as well as sponsoring the Cover Model contest, Dorchester held its annual party. A proper party with a great band playing great music, with melon and crackers and cheese and hot pretzels which I would have liked a bit of butter on, but when I said that my table companions recoiled in horror. Mustard just isn’t my thing, but I do like a piece of bread and butter from time to time. Most of the cover models and the Cavemen were present, having fun and winding down after their exhausting day. Looking beautiful is hard work.

Because I’m an Ellora’s Cave author, I got to see a teeny bit more than most, although I haven’t discovered who is on the cover of Icefire, coming to Ellora’s on May 2nd. Any ideas?

[Ed.: This is Chris Winters too.  HAMINA HAMINA HAMINA!]