I found this oddly fitting after the happenings over the last few days. I will say and have said until I am blue in the face, reposting private information is never the way to go. And I can think of very few reasons I would think it is ever ok.
If you HAVE to use someone else’s words to report on news, you shouldn’t be reporting news. Two wrongs don’t make a right but we should always keep in mind the internet is a big place. What you think may be private, may not be. Where you send something, could be routed wrong, with no blame at all on the sender. So really, everyone should keep in mind that whatever you throw out on the net could very well pop up later when you least expect it.
Retro Post: November 14, 2006
As a rule I try to never trash a book or a person. It generally isn’t my style. I rant. I rave. I have strong opinions and I think many actions of many people are stupid. But thinking the actions of a person aren’t the brightest thing, disagreeing with them or not liking their book is a far cry from trashing, bashing, harassing or whatever.
Oh course I have my moments… I can be a bitch. And most of the time I am very unapologetic about it. Although I am happy to admit when I am wrong. I dislike many people and many more dislike me. I dislike many a book and there are many more I like. I tend to think of myself as one of those people who is killing romance as you want it (or at least kristie, jane, keishon and the like).
I am happy with the majority of what I am reading. In fact there are many I love and quite a few I know I shouldn’t. But what the fuck, I am cool with that and if you are still here I would assume you are too. Because no matter what I love or hate – I don’t expect you to have the same opinion nor would I ever, ever expect a anyone (friend or not) to only agree with me.
Yesterday I had someone I greatly respect tell me that my blog strikes a good balance. And that is what I aim for… I want authors to feel comfortable to post. I want readers to feel comfortable to post. And most of all I never want anyone to feel that they have to agree with me.
And I had another I greatly respect pretty much tell me I am unethical or at least I think that was her point.
After a great many emails, some thought and a few more emails from a many people I have come to the conclusion that:
Fair Use is your friend.
Anyone who criticizes people, their work, their actions or whatever the hell should be able to except criticism… aka if you can’t take the heat isn’t just advice for authors.
People who tell others to ‘behave like a grown up‘ should take their own advice.
Anything I post in a public place has a chance of being quoted elsewhere on the internet.
If someone disagrees with my opinion, they can still be my friend.
If you don’t want people discussing what you say or what you write – don’t put it on the internet and don’t publish it.
but most of all…
If you disagree with any of the above, do feel free to post and give your opinion. I am always open to listening to different views. And have even been known to change my mind and agree.
But may I suggest if any of the above bothers you to the point that you are close to cracking, losing your hold on reality or if you don’t understand that YOU are the only person responsible for YOUR actions…well then you should just…
Hey, Syb, I think your assessment is dead on. I don’t expect anyone to kiss my ass or blow smoke up my skirt simply for the sake of it.
Everyone is entitled to their opinions and the right to express them.
I might disagree with you on certain topics, but I’ll always respect your right to say what you think. I read your blog regularly and do feel comfortable posting.
Keep on rockin’ girl. Don’t ever change and don’t let anyone drag you down. 🙂
Everyone has the right to their own opinions just don’t try to force them on others. A discusion is fine, but if you put your opinion out there be prepared to defend it and to get feedback, welcome or otherwise.
PS I love that video, I haven’t thought of that in years.
Hey bint, I think your blog is nice and balanced.
As for my own blog, I’m totally over caring how I come across. My real life is one big balancing act, so the blog gives me freedom to express myself without fear of offending anybody who matters.
Syb, you’re the fairest bitch I know. Shake ya tailfeather.
DAMMIT! How come all the good shit always happens when I’m not around?? Are you doing this on purpose? Are you TRYING to give me a complex? *sniffle*
See, I think you ARE a bitch some of the time, but hey, so am I…and guess what? We aren’t the only ones. I think ALL women have an inner bitch, some just choose to let her loose more often than others. Whatever floats your boat.
I also think that THIS IS YOUR BLOG, if people don’t agree with what you have to say (to the point where they need to send email bombs and shit) they can take a hike.
Some peoples kids.
Sybil —
Sometimes you’re the sh*t and sometimes you’re the sandwich. Either way, it’s still sh*t.
This is your playground — do whatever you want.
I’m going to agree with Holly. We all have the tendency to be a bitch, and are entitled to it from time to time. This is your place, so you can be however you want. If people don’t like it, they can leave the party.
One thing I will say is that people do get a little too sensitive and defensive over stuff that really doesn’t mean all that much when you really think about it. I don’t think it’s worth getting worked up over. If you’re gonna be a bitch, make it count LOL.
I love reading differing opinions -I don’t think I’d be blogging if everyone was exactly the same. We just have to be aware that not everyone’s gonna like it. That’s life.
I love when I read something and am clueless to the back story. Whatever prompted this post can’t be more important than the reason (probably) you started the blog…to have a place to have your say.
Pretty sure that as long as attribution is given and you are not wholesale republishing articles from around the ‘net, fair use protects you. And yes, if you state something publicly, no matter if it is on a message board or in an opinion article or a review, you are opening yourself up to criticism.
The “if you can’t take the heat” theorem should apply to everyone, even reviewers (particularly those who consider themselves as “professionals”).
finally, it is your blog and no one can control what goes on here. Much to others’ chagrin, I am sure.
I’ve said this before, right here on this very blog, but since I made a decision to be a public figure, and to have my opinions scrutinized by the public, whether I agree with their idiotic assesments or not, I find that I have less than no patience for people who prattle on about how we shoudl all be super-duper supportive and nice all the time.
Don’t want to be held to a public standard? Fine. Don’t be public. It is a *decision* to go onto the web. Nobody’s making people post to chatrooms, etc. Nobody forced me to run for office or to walk precincts.
And once you’re public, the rest of the world does have an opinion of you. They do. And they have a right to express it. Really.
Carry On.
Excellent post, Sybil. I’ve never noticed you being unfair.
You are not allowed to pick fights with people while I’m in the process of moving across the country. I feel left out. Wait a few more days before saying anything controversial.
I hate not knowing what the heck is going on…
I love this blog. Don’t change it or try to appease every single person. Keep up the awesome comments. What the hell happened by the way? Did I miss something?
Right on, sister!!
But to me, the most important thing you said was, “NOTHING ON THE INTERNET EVER DIES.”
And that’s why I try to make sure that I don’t come off as a total bitch (although I think in my attempt to do that I often come off as a dumba$$, but, eh, it’s always something).
I don’t my grandkids to be online 50 years from now and say, “boy, gradma was a horrible person!”
Shoot, Sybil. You’re not unethical. Since when is openly stating your opinion and standing by it unethical?
Sorry you’ve gotten dumped for this. Tomorrow it will be somebody else’s turn, and most likely it will be somebody else that doesn’t deserve it.
I think that post was well said. And it also shows how variations on the same srgument keep coming up over and over and over…Is this like the mean reviewer thing, where people are going to disagree no matter what? Then, like that issue, people have got to agree to disagree. [But somehow, I doubt that’s going to happen]
You’ve made your viewpoint very clear. And to me, personally, it makes a shitload of sense. Don’t sweat it. You’d did everything the right way–taking it to your own blog, not flipping out on people, being clear that you were only stating your own opinion.
I agree that your site is well-balanced, Sybil. If you dislike something, you say so – but trashing books and/or authors is not the focus of your site. The vast majority of your posts are positive. Plus the ducks are fun. *g* Very true that anything posted on the internet is there forever and anybody can read it. Good reason to think twice before posting!
I don’t get around to many blogs and those few not that often, but I do find yours well-balanced and fair, and you are clear on your opinions.