Stevie‘s review of Undressed (The Manhattanites, Book 1) by Avery Aster
Contemporary erotic romance published by Ellora’s Cave 15 Feb 13
I was offered this book after agreeing to review the second in the series, which has an intriguing blurb. Not being keen on starting series in the middle, I decided to read this one first, even though the blurb doesn’t exactly thrill me. As it turns out, the story as described in the blurb isn’t that bad; however, the book as a whole feels as if two separate genres have been cut and pasted into one narrative: one a romance with an annoying hero and heroine but reasonably well set down, and the other something that reads like badly scripted, late 20th-century porn-film dialogue.
So ignoring the porn dialogue (which I find intensely unerotic) for the most part and sticking with the romance story line, the novel tells the story of Alexandra (Lex) Easton, the daughter of a famous rock star, with her own fashion label and an unhealthy obsession with the romance between Edward VIII and That Woman (honestly, if you want a tragic romance from that era, involving a rich American and an English aristocrat, whatever’s wrong with studying Kathleen Kennedy and Billy Hartington? Those two only had five weeks of marriage before he was killed serving his country). Having not thrown the book at the wall any time she-who-shall-not-be-named is sighed over, we read on to discover that Lex has a bit of a problem (not to mention a second rather unhealthy obsession).
Prince Massimo Tittoni owns the fabric company which supplies Lex’s label (well, it beats running a tourist attraction or engaging in large-scale farming, I suppose). He is also reputedly the best looking and most well-endowed of eligible bachelors. Lex has named her vibrator after him, which I find odd, but never mind. As a matter of fact, all the men in this story seem to be overly endowed to the point that some of the sex described sounds painful, if not downright damaging, but I’m trying to focus on the romance plot in this review. So Massimo’s company is supposed to have sent fabric over to Lex in time for her next big show, but the delivery hasn’t turned up. And it’s the summer holidays in Italy (I’ve worked in Rome during July and August and fully understand why most Italians choose not to, as well as knowing better than to disturb them wherever they’ve gone to with their families, unless the world really is about to end). Lex jets off to the Prince’s island using Airmiles rather than any of her maxed-out credit cards, and that really ought to be a clue as to what’s going on, but whatever…
Massimo is not pleased to see Lex – he wasn’t paid for the fabric and so didn’t send it, and now he’s on holiday and not at all keen to talk business – but he tries to make her welcome. Lex annoys everyone, trying to tip the family retainers, asking if the paintings are real or fakes, not wanting to eat the food, generally getting in the way. For some reason Massimo is attracted to her anyway, and wants her to come in on his plans to launch a new fashion line. Massimo’s friends spend a lot of time involved in threesomes (at one point Lex walks in on one and stays to watch), but for complex reasons of backstory, he’s a one-woman sort of bloke (which does lead one to question why he surrounds himself with these people, but maybe I missed the memo explaining that part).
Having reached an agreement of sorts regarding their various business interests, Massimo takes Lex to fashion events in Milan, at which she alternately acts publicity shy and acts in ways guaranteed to get gossip magazines buzzing. Eventually they get together only for things to go wrong, because Lex forgot to tell Massimo about a vital part of her manufacturing process which could ruin his whole venture. In the middle of all this, there’s a rather squicky aside in which one of Massimo’s (male) staff is dancing with the Pope at a party (presumably the book was written before he announced his retirement) – do I have to explain all the reasons why this feels wrong, wrong, wrong (and I’m a pagan)? Oh, and Massimo thinks Lex smells of kiwi, by which I assume he means kiwi fruit rather than a flightless bird or any other inhabitant of New Zealand.
In the end Lex goes home with her fabric and pulls off a fabulous show only for Massimo to turn up and do two things that really tip the balance in my opinion from his being an annoying alpha male to nastily coercive (highlight for spoiler:) he proposes to Lex on the runway at the end of the show, which gives her no opportunity to think about what’s going on, and then he pushes her into a discussion about children in the middle of their post-engagement sex scene – the outcome of which I suspect he’ll hold over her every time she complains about being pregnant, (metaphorically) barefoot, and (metaphorically) chained to the kitchen sink from then on.
I can see why this story would appeal to either people who like stories about relationships between Americans and European royalty or to people who like a particular type of erotica (and don’t get me wrong, some of my literary kinks have been known to squick other people), but I’m a little unsure whether the intersection of the two groups is really large enough for both halves of this story to work for many readers. I’m going to read the next in the series, anyway; elements of the blurb intrigue me, although I’m not sure the author can handle them in a way that will resonate with this reader.
Grade: D
Summary:
Milan’s notorious playboy, Prince Tittoni, seems to have everything—Lamborghinis, exotic women, palaces throughout Europe and business success. Ramping up his fabric company to go global with a new apparel brand, he ruthlessly stops supplying fabrics to the American client who inspired the collection. But once they meet, what’s he willing to give to get her in his bed?
Upper East Side designer Lex Easton has already endured her fair share of hard knocks. She’ll be damned if she’ll let an Italian stud muffin knock her down. So what if she named her favorite vibrator after him? With Fashion Week approaching, she’ll do whatever it takes to secure the fabrics she needs to make her clothing line an international success—even sleep with her rival.
Lex’s Louboutins are dug in deep to win this war. All’s fair in love and fashion!
Inside Scoop: Though the hero and heroine remain monogamous, their Prada-wearing friends indulge in a ménage a trois and other fashionable sexual fun and games.
Read an excerpt.
Other books in this series:
