Sandy M’s review of Patience (Passion, Book 2) by Lisa Valdez
Historical Romance published by Berkley 6 Apr 10

Wow, this book has me all wound up every which way, thrown for a loop all the way to next Sunday, and then boomeranged back right to where I started. Some of it good, some of it I could have done without, and then some it simply wonderfully terrific.

First of all, I never read Passion by Ms. Valdez. I, of course, heard the buzz when it released and wanted to read it, but I just never got to it. I know fans of that book have waited on pins and needles for this second one. So I’m assuming that because I haven’t kept up with that buzz from the beginning, I was not prepared for the erotic nature of Patience. When I got to that first scene making it clear a D/s theme was imminent, especially after the opening of the book, which is emotional as all get-out, I had one huge moment of doubt.

I began so enamored of the hero in the gut-wrenching opening scenes. The latest gossip to scuttle through society is that Matthew Morgan Hawkmore is a gardener’s bastard, thus he’s shunned by everyone except those few close friends and family. We even get to read the letter his fiance sent to him breaking off their engagement. Everything that had been within his grasp is now gone.

In the midst of Matthew’s emotional struggle, Patience walks in and his senses flare double time, an intense smoldering cauldron of disbelief, despair, and then desire. This is all within a few pages, and I’m loving every darned minute of it, thinking what a read this is going to be. That thought does go on for a bit, but too soon all those emotions came crashing down around me.

I do read erotica now and again. There’s been very few I’ve cared for, however. While I did like parts of this book’s sex scenes, there were others concerning Matthew’s determination to master Patience that I just didn’t like. Humiliation is neither sexy nor erotic to me. Patience humping Matthew’s leg after a lengthy session of him denying her orgasm is humiliating, even though he loved every minute of it. The idea that Matthew just knows Patience is a submissive and he’s going to prove it read more like browbeating her into believing she is.

Of course, Patience has her own issues. She’s vowed not to let another man hurt her, so has given herself totally over to her music and is planning to leave soon to study with a renowned master of the cello, Patience’s adored instrument. Matthew doesn’t want her to go, manipulates the situation to keep her close, and systematically tears down her walls, mostly through mastering her. He plays the cello too, and there are a couple of scenes between them centering around the instrument that show a Matthew I like.

On that point, the man ran hot and cold for me. I would like him for a while and then his domination would send me in the other direction. He does, however, win me over in the end. And there’s plenty of other happenings in the book that kept me interested enough to keep reading. If this had been a straight erotic novel, I would have given up. There’s no doubt that Ms. Valdez is a powerful writer. She definitely moved me from one extreme to the other.

Once finished with this book, I wondered if Passion had been written in the same vein, but I’ve been informed it’s not. When I can finally locate it in the TBR pile, I’m starting on it right then. If this author can move me so while reading a theme that isn’t my favorite, my imagination runs wild  with the idea of what she can do with something I usually enjoy reading.

Grade: B-

Summary:

A WOMAN CALLED PATIENCE. A DESIRE THAT WOULD PUT HER NAME—AND HER LOVE—TO THE TEST.

Known for her exceptional beauty, Patience Emmalina Dare has been pursued by admirers ever since coming of age. But suitor after suitor fails to inspire her love – or her desire. Certain she will never find a man who touches her deeply, she decides to forgo marriage in favor of pursuing her music. But just when Patience thinks she has her life well in hand, a passionate kiss with her enigmatic brother-in-law awakens a powerful need in her. How will she reconcile her desire for him and her desire for a life that’s her own – and what will she do when he shows her a deep and hidden part of herself that she never knew existed?

When the secret of his illegitimate birth pushes Matthew Morgan Hawkmore from his place in society, the darkly handsome half-brother of the Earl of Langley plots his resurrection and his revenge. Betrayed and abandoned by the women he believed loved him, he swears to never again be controlled by love. But despite his vow, he is unable to resist the beautiful Patience, whose strength and self-reliance hide a need that he is perfectly suited to fulfill. Can he have her without loving her? What will he give up to keep her? And will her passionate surrender be the one thing that can stop him from making a tragic mistake that could destroy them both…

Read an excerpt.

Other books in this series:

I will give Lisa Valdez kudos for saying she would update on 4/30 and, hey!, she updated!

And asks for more time and Patience. And one day she will even tell you all about why the book took so long. She also lost all her email contacts (I am thinking it might have had something to do with never answering them and the mailbox overflowing and making everything bounce…. but I am just guessing…).  But join her Yahoo group so you can learn all the not!news news first!

Read the full ‘update’ behind the more tag (you know how her site likes to go down and lose things)…

Gracious Readers,

I had hoped to announce today that the once and for all, never to be revised, re-written, re-analyzed, re-worked (except at Cindy’s request) version of PATIENCE was turned in. Alas, I’m not quite there. However, I am VERY close. One day, I will talk more about the struggles with this book, and all the beginnings I wrote that weren’t really the beginning. But for now, all I can say is that PATIENCE is more than a book, it’s a virtue. And though you are likely as parched for PATIENCE as my sainted editor, I beg your indulgence for just a bit longer.

As soon as I have at last released the final manuscript from what will, no-doubt, be my reluctant hands, I will post that I have done so. I will also post the moment I have a release date from Cindy.

Also, as some of you are aware, my web-site went down temporarily. Unfortunately, I lost my whole address book. So, even if we’ve been in touch in the past, please join my Yahoo Group. Then, as soon as I have news I will send an announcement there first.

Many thanks to all of you for your continuing support . . .

Ciao bellas,
Lisa

© Lisa Valdez 2005. All rights reserved.

Does being gone count as an update?

Doesn’t really mean much since Karen Scott’s blog is down (again) too and she isn’t going anywhere. No really, sorry NCP no breaking out into song yet. Damn woman I can’t keep up, or is it Torquere wanting to drink on your cold, dead blog?

Whatevs.. No worries though until her site is back up you can find her here.

As for the professional writer… Your guess is as good as mine where you can find her. But, golly gee, nice of the hobby blogger to keep in touch – yes? Someone should maybe take notes? Oh is that mean of me?

Lisa Valdez: A Timeline

I have been reminded that not EVERYONE hangs on my every ssqqquuueee and some may have no fucking clue what the hell I was talking about with my post the other day.

To which my response was and this is different from any other day/subject/post how?

I am still waiting for an answer.

It did remind me I have been a very bad bad blogger and must say I am deeply sorry for falling down on the job and not updating this nifty lil time line I had going. So for those of you playing the home game…

Update as of 2/05/09

January, 2009
NEWS from the Lisa Valdez
Honestly I had no clue she had posted cuz if I had I would have already said something. Oh but since she has, I can now… so I guess I will. brb

January 7, 2009
The Mysterious Lisa Valdez and Having Patience
This thread isn’t really news I don’t think, haven’t read through it. I think katiebabs speaks up and states the obvious but other than that nothing new. But it amuses the hell out of me to see the same ol and the could u b satan shit.. along with omg she is nice! Cuz you know she is nice, VERY nice and the next time your boss calls you into his office and you are 10000 late on your project – tell him but SIR I am so nice! – and come back here and tell us how far that gets you. PLEASE I am dying to know. Yes I know, I iz satan.

April 30, 2008
No news is the same news

February 19, 2008
Lisa Valdez Speaks…sort of

February 18, 2008
Could Part of Lisa Valdez’s Hold Up Be her Choice of CPs?? aka sybil was being a smartass but really really really… NOTHING I have said in the past week is anything I haven’t said to Lisa Valdez herself or her editor. Ok well I didn’t ask if her CPs were stoopid because honestly don’t think that is the hold up.

Last updated:
September 23, 2007
I have to admit I have always liked Lisa Valdez. She amuses me as a person and entertains me as an author (so far). But I am the first to admit to being out of patience more than once with Patience. So I completely get that some are beyond the wait.

But I find it so amazingly cool that so many people are still looking for information on her, the book and for a new release date. And I feel a touch guilty because I have no new info up for the people stopping by to look for Lisa Valdez info.

About a week or two ago I connected her editor to see if a date had been set yet that I could post.

Sadly the answer is still no, not yet. The good news is Penguin is committed to publishing Patience and the book is currently on target with its deadlines. Yeah I know, not much huh . I was hoping for a bit more info before I posted but hey something is better than nothing right?

Even though no date was given and it is more than likely we won’t see this until 2008, it is great to hear we are closer and that the project isn’t dead. Or maybe the best part is the editor is still so jazzed about the book. Hopefully there will be more news soon ::crosses fingers::

past posts:
Update April 15, 2007
Lisa Valdez’s Newsletter and Excerpt

Update April 13, 2007
Remember Lisa Valdez?

Patience by Lisa Valdez TBA **Now with Intro & Excerpt**

Updated Nov 12, 2006
cream, sugar or milk…

Update Nov 11, 2006
If you can’t take the heat…

Updated Nov 9, 2006
Just a Little Patience (guest post: Lisa Valdez)

Running out of patience

first posted 2/25/06
Lisa Valdez has a new website! Way cool since her last one was not set up well, uh sez I. There is also her new book cover for Patience and at the same link a new excerpt!

Now I am one to try and not read excerpts… but having read the one at the back of Passion (loved this book) and not liking it. I was way curious to see how this one played.

I have changed my mind, I want this book!

Look an update!

Shocking I tells ya, I mean… who know?

Sorry this is what happens when they leave me alone and go off to bed and such. I have to say regardless of the feeling some may have taken away from my smartassness, I wish Lisa Valdez the best of luck in finishing her book.

I personally am glad to see her take a step, small as it may be, in the right direction.

Or maybe I am misunderstanding? Or the point here is seriously lost, confused or just jack completely…

Gina Black (which btw who is that?) posted on Romantic Times regarding her friend Lisa Valdez:

Post Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 12:53 pm Yes! I have seen Lisa and I am delighted to report that she is well. Smile She is staying off the internet and away from email and other such cyberdistractions. I know she truly appreciates her fans, and I assure you she *is* working hard at the keyboard these days.


I can say with assurance that you have a treat ahead. Other than that I cannot say as I am not her spokesperson, but her devoted critique partner and friend.


Gina

Am I the only one who sees that as not all that and a bag of chips? My response is here.

No offense Gina but I think at this point Lisa really can’t assure anything. She is working hard? Is that to say she WASN’T working hard before but now three years later she has decided too? Is that suppose to reassure me? Or better yet as a reader should I care?


Cyberdistractions are all well and good. I can understand needing to ‘disconnect’. And when you have blown your deadline as many times as she has I think it is prolly a good idea to not be connected.


BUT I say this as a reader, a fan and someone who personally likes Lisa Valdez – what message is this sending? I am going to hope she has no idea you posted and this isn’t ‘from’ her. Either the message is insulting or poorly worded… or my reader comprehension is way off because what I get from your message is:


1. Lisa Valdez was lying before when she said she was hard at work on the novel and would soon be finished.


2. She is NOW working hard to finish the novel – the three? four? times before when she was ‘working hard’ to finish it were…. what? practice rounds?


3. “Playing” on the net is one thing but you are saying she can’t be bothered to update a monthly newsletter or follow through what she committed to – not once, not twice, not even three times – to her fans.


4. You can take the time to inform her fans of her status but that is too much trouble for her to do.


So really really, I just hope this was very poorly worded and or done without her approval or proofing the post. Because if she did… as her reader, her fan and someone who has stuck by her I am insulted.


[quote="Gina Black"]
I can say with assurance that you have a treat ahead. Other than that I cannot say as I am not her spokesperson, but her devoted critique partner and friend.
Gina[/quote]


uh, the idea you are her CP and this is your idea of an idea well expressed does not give me hope for the book. Other than that all I can say, is maybe I am just beyond annoyed by now and misreading but I don’t think you are doing your friend any favors with this post.


Sybil

Feel free to tell me I am wrong… and uh what the hell is up with RT website? Their coding seems to be screwed or is that yet another new and nifty screw up with my computer?

There was a slight mix-up at first with the link from Lisa’s newsletter. So I fixed it by changing the link to the post where the excerpt was. But I noticed some error’s hitting the first link which I had changed. Soooooo I created this one.

My point? Isn’t wordpress nifty? LOL okay and you can find:

Lisa Valdez’s April letter on her site here.

And her excerpt can be found here.

As for a release date, sadly there isn’t one yet. I am keeping my fingers crossed we know soon.

Patience by Lisa Valdez

A WOMAN CALLED PATIENCE. A DESIRE THAT WOULD PUT HER NAME AND HER LOVE TO THE TEST.

Known for her exceptional beauty, Patience Emmalina Dare has been pursued by admirers ever since coming of age. But suitor after suitor fails to inspire her love or her desire. Certain she will never find a man who touches her deeply, she decides to forgo marriage in favor of pursuing her music. But just when Patience thinks she has her life well in hand, a passionate kiss with her enigmatic brother-in-law awakens a powerful need in her. How will she reconcile her desire for him and her desire for a life that’s her own and what will she do when he shows her a deep and hidden part of herself that she never knew existed?  

When the secret of his illegitimate birth pushes Matthew Morgan Hawkmore from his place in society, the darkly handsome half-brother of the Earl of Langley plots his resurrection and his revenge. Betrayed and abandoned by the women he believed loved him, he swears to never again be controlled by love. But despite his vow, he is unable to resist the beautiful Patience, whose strength and self-reliance hide a need that he is perfectly suited to fulfill. Can he have her without loving her? What will he give up to keep her? And will her passionate surrender be the one thing that can stop him from making a tragic mistake that could destroy them both

Good day, dear Readers! Mrs. Valdez is terribly busy click-click-clicking on that thing that seems to be strapped to her lap of late. So she has asked that I, Mathilda Dare (Aunt Matty), come here in her stead–which, of course, I am only too happy to do since the Swittley sisters did NOT invite me to accompany them on their tour through the Lake District. Not that I care, mind you, because they’ve really become quite tiresome of late now that their nephew is on the stage–of all places. Which brings me back to Mrs. Valdez, who has, thank goodness, not gone upon the stage. No, indeed. And contrary to rumor, she did not sell all her worldly goods and move to a cave in the Himalayas. She wasn’t blinded by a palm frond, nor crippled by the heel of a passing gentleman at the museum. And she most certainly wasn’t killed because she stored her picnic cutlery under her seat during a thunderstorm.

What? You don’t know what picnic I’m speaking of? Oh, that’s right, you haven’t read PATIENCE yet, have you? Dear me, but Mrs. Valdez certainly has taken a dreadfully long time with that book, hasn’t she. I’m completely fed up with her myself. Which is why I am so grateful to the wise, beautiful and tenacious Lady Sybil for wringing a little snippet of the book from Mrs. Valdez’ clenched fingers. Just between us, it was quite a scuffle. But Mrs. Valdez really must be taken in hand–I’m only glad that I was there to see it.

Well, I simply must be off. I hear my maid coming with the tea tray. I hope you enjoy the bit of PATIENCE that Lady Sybil was able to acquire for you, and at such great risk to herself, too. I tell you, the woman is a heroine. Joan of Arc would have envied her… Frannie! Where is my tea?

A LETTER OF LITTLE CONSCEQUENCE

My Dear Henrietta,

You simply can’t imagine all the scandalous goings-on! You’re missing everything! Of all the times for you to be in Italy! I tell you, my dear, there isn’t likely to be a grander entertainment than this in our lifetimes. And wait till you hear who is at the center of it all. I daresay, you shall never guess. For, until his engagement, he was considered one of the most eligible bachelors in England. Have you guessed? It is none other than the very man who you had once hoped to match with your daughter. Yes, Mr. Matthew Morgan Hawkmore!

Oh, Henrietta, where shall I begin? Let me just say that once you have heard what’s happened, you will be thankful that Mr. Hawkmore never took to your Amarantha. Had he, you would now be embroiled in a scandal from which you would never recover. Never, I tell you!

Are you ready, my dear? You should sit down if you aren’t already seated.

It turns out that the rich, handsome, charming and popular Mr. Hawkmore is a bastard! Yes! And to make matters ever so much worse, his father was a gardener! Yes, it’s really true! And the whole thing came to light in a most shocking and unseemly way.

You remember from my last letter that his brother, the Earl of Langley, had become engaged to a commoner by the name of Charlotte Lawrence? Well, it turns out that the chit’s mother was blackmailing the earl into marrying her daughter. The woman had in her possession some letters which revealed the truth of Mr. Hawkmore’s parentage. And the disgusting fact is that the letters were written by none other than Lucinda Hawkmore, herself. Though how a mother—a Lady—could write such letters, I’ll never know. One was actually printed, my dear, and spread all over London. I saw it myself in Lady Winston’s parlor, and it was perfectly awful. In it, the Countess gloated, and spoke of how it pleased her to see her little bastard in the Hawkmore linens. She even spoke of the possibility of him inheriting the earldom one day! Can you imagine?

The whole blackmail scheme was revealed in The Times. Though no names were mentioned, everyone knows exactly who was being referred to. Oh, and it turns out that the revelation of the truth was very fortunate for the Earl of Langley. Who knew, but it seems that he really is in love with a commoner—only it isn’t Charlotte Lawrence. It’s some widow from Lincolnshire! A Mrs. Passion Elizabeth Reddington (have you ever heard such an outrageous name?). Apparently he is head-over-heels for her, and is to marry her within the next fortnight. Some have the idea that she’s a distant relation of this Charlotte Lawrence, but I don’t have that on any authority. Anyway, it’s all too romantic, and everyone is just dying to meet her.

But as for Mr. Hawkmore—well, the Lady Rosalind has broken with him. And her father, Lord Benchley, is in an absolute fury. He believes Mr. Hawkmore knew of his true parentage all along. Which might be true because apparently the late Earl knew the baby wasn’t his own. And if he knew, Lord Benchley says that surely Mr. Hawkmore learned the truth as well at some point. This, of course, would make him not only a bastard, but a liar and a fraud as well.

God knows what the truth really is. Right now, opinions do seem to be split on the matter. Some agree with Benchley, some are uncertain, but everyone is striking Mr. Hawkmore from their guest lists, so I suppose it doesn’t really matter.

If you come home now, Henrietta, you won’t miss whatever is to come—for, surely, there is more to come. Who is this bride of the earl’s? Does she have any family? Will the Lady Rosalind get engaged again? If so, to whom? And perhaps most interesting of all, what will become of Mr. Matthew Morgan Hawkmore?

Yours,

Augusta

CHAPTER ONE – PATIENCE, A PRELUDE

Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair, thou hast doves’ eyes. Song of Solomon 1:15

June 30, 1851

Wiltshire, England ~ Hawkmore House, County Seat of the Earl and Countess of Langley

Moonlight, soft and pearlescent, filtered through the windows that lined one side of the long portrait gallery. Rectangles of illumination fell upon the carpet and crept up the opposing wall, revealing a path of alternating light and darkness that traversed the entire length of the gallery.

Patience Emmalina Dare paused just inside the broad entrance. A tentative stillness filled the space—as if, only a moment before, something or someone had stirred the air with some small movement. As if the inhabitants of the ornate, gilded frames might have just ceased their whispered conversations, and were merely waiting for her to pass before they resumed.

Patience strolled slowly forward. Long ago, when she had suffered so many sleepless nights, she had made friends with the dark. It didn’t frighten her. Indeed, for some reason, the long room of light and shadow beckoned her. It was as if some sort of magic were at work.

Her silk dressing gown swished softly as she meandered her way through the gallery. She stopped here and there to study the faces of the Hawkmores, to whom she was now related by marriage. Such an old and noble family.

Patience sighed. In one day, she had gone from simple vicar’s daughter to sister of the Countess of Langley. Her new status would, no doubt, bring a whole new horde of annoying suitors down upon her. She wanted none of it. Her decision to remain unmarried had been made long ago.

And yet…

She twisted one of her long curls around her finger as she crossed to a window.

Earlier that day, as she had watched her sister pledge her troth to the Earl, she had seen the beautiful, transcendent love in their eyes and a tremor of doubt had shaken her resolve.

Leaning her forehead on the glass, she stared down at the well manicured side garden. She had passed through it that morning as she had escorted her sister to the chapel.

What perfect happiness Passion and Mark seemed to have found. Patience sighed and her breath briefly clouded the window. She would never have what they had—romantic love, the comforting sacrament of marriage, or the miraculous joy of motherhood.

Instead, she would have her cello. And the freedom and independence that came with having to rely upon no one for her happiness. She would continue to teach music at the church school. She would care for her father in his declining years, and she would be a doting aunt. It was a trade she had felt comfortable with—until today.

Today, she’d watched her sister find joy.

A sudden vision of dark, intense eyes floated through her mind.

And today, Matthew Morgan Hawkmore had watched her.

A warm thrill coursed through her as she moved away from the window and continued through the gallery. Was her handsome brother-in-law the real reason for her sleeplessness?

Her body tensed with an answering rush of desire.

That morning, as they had stood across from each other, siblings, each of them, to the bride and groom, there had been a moment when he had captured her in his unwavering gaze. Dark and demanding, his eyes had touched her and held her as tenaciously as the firm grip of a hand. Unable to move or look away, she had submitted to his determined regard as he had seemed to delve into her heart—searching for…what?

Then, as she’d stood powerless to hide herself, he’d blinked. And in the blink of his eye, he’d suddenly seemed to have some certain knowledge of her.

The experience had completely unnerved her. Yet, it had also left her flushed and warm, as if he’d truly touched her.

Patience paused before a portrait of two boys. The moonlight washed away color, but she recognized the deep, soulful eyes of the younger boy. They were like dove’s eyes, calm and soft, yet dark and knowing.

She smoothed her hand over her fluttering stomach. Of course, Matthew couldn’t possibly know her. No man had ever really known her. Her heart slowed. No man ever would.

And yet, she couldn’t assuage the feeling that he had, for a moment, looked inside her heart. What had he seen there? What was the inexplicable bond she felt when she looked into his beautiful eyes—as if some important and inescapable connection existed between them?

A small pulse beat once between her legs. She closed her eyes with a gasp of consternation. And why did she feel such tenacious desire for him?

She looked again at the portrait. He hadn’t attended the wedding luncheon, so she’d had no opportunity to speak with him. In fact, other than a stiff introduction, they’d never conversed—a point that was conspicuous in its oddity.

She leaned closer to the painting, but found no answers in the silent face of the young Matthew depicted there. A small sigh escaped her. She didn’t like not knowing the reasons for things. But as she reached out and made a tiny adjustment to straighten the frame, she acknowledged that God did not owe her any explanations. If her path was to cross with Matthew’s, then God would make it so.

Clasping her hands loosely behind her back, Patience moved on. She glanced up at two life-sized portraits, one of a man and one of a woman. She recognized the woman as Lucinda Hawkmore, Mark and Matthew’s mother. The other must be the late Earl of Langley. Patience frowned. Though handsome, his face was creased with sorrow. How terribly exhausted and defeated he looked.

A narrow table separated the two portraits, as if to keep them apart. Patience stepped forward as she noticed a paper lying on the marble top. Picking it up, she lifted it to Athena’s bright light.

June 20, 1851

Mr. Hawkmore,

Patience paused for a moment. She shouldn’t read a letter not meant for her. It was wrong. Yet, even as she acknowledged the thought, she found her eyes rushing to the next line.

I resent the necessity for this letter. But as you refuse to accept my father’s word regarding the dissolution of our engagement, I find myself in the unpleasant position of having to write to you myself. Please accept all that I shall say as my true and sincere sentiments.

It should be obvious to you that we will not suit. The shocking revelation of your parentage, the publication of your mother’s disgusting letter in which she revels over your illegitimate birth, and the scandal which accompanied its disclosure, have made a match between us utterly impossible. It should also be obvious to you that I could never, ever, marry the son of a gardener.

Now, while I did, at one time, feel some measure of appreciation for you, I assure you I no longer harbor any such feelings. Indeed, upon reflection, I believe you will come to realize that you always cared more for me than I for you. So, perhaps your disgrace is a blessing in disguise, as it has saved me—and you—from a marriage that would have proven unsatisfactory in time.

Finally, as my father has already told you, we find your protests of innocence in this matter to be completely unbelievable. Were you a man of honor and nobility you would admit your deceit, but clearly your ill breeding disallows such honesty.

Mr. Hawkmore, I demand you do not write to me again, or attempt to visit. My father has already informed you that neither you nor your missives will be permitted past our threshold. Do not embarrass me with further attempts.

Sincerely,

Rosalind Benchley

Post Script ~ Your mother would do well to stay in Austria where I hear tell that she has fled. Perhaps you should join her there.

Patience’s chest felt tight as she lowered Rosalind Benchley’s missive. It was an awful, ugly letter—a disgusting letter. She blinked back the sting in her eyes. A letter that reminded her too much of the one she had received long ago.

“Now that you’ve had a look, I’ll take that.”

Patience whirled and stared into the shadows that hung heavy between the windows on the opposite wall. The moonlight blinded her, so she stepped slowly into the shadows herself. Only then, did the whiteness of a shirt and the dark silhouette of a man appear. He was sitting on the dim shape of a couch set against the wall.

Patience’s blood rushed and sudden warmth touched the nerves just beneath her skin. She hadn’t expected that God would direct their paths quite so quickly.

“Hello, Matthew.”

* * *

A small part of Jane’s response in If You Can’t Take the Heat, mentioned Passion’s Breastfeeding sex bit:

Further for Ms. V to write that she didn’t expect this type of response also seems a bit ridiculous. Her book was filled with extreme and provocative sex scenes (sex while breastfeeding?). Of course, there was going to be negative responses. I suspect Jaid Black get hate mail constantly for corrupting the morals of the world.

off of that Lisa Valdez asked:

Okay, and will someone please tell me what the big deal is with sex while breastfeeding? Why is that so shocking? Sex made the baby, and it’s not as if the baby knows what’s going on. I think it’s weird that people think it’s weird. Sorry, that’s off topic. Forget I asked.

**now updated with list and links**

Now this is a topic I find mucho amusing, more because of a chat than about the book itself.

The scene in question takes place at the very end of the book. And I will have to go find mine to be sure but I think it is all of a paragraph. But it totally squicks some people out.

Does it squick you? Did you make note of it while reading?

A few months back (I think) while searching for something on AAR I came across something talking about sex while breast feeding (is this one word or two?). It was Laurie’s News and Views #77 from August 1, 1999 (I soooooo love the old Laurie’s News and Views much more than I like the ATBF of today. Is that just me?).

I expected it to be about Passion (no I didn’t note the date at the time *g*). But it wasn’t… there were OTHER books where this happens. The old list that the AARList members put together had these titles:

* Broomstick Cowboy by Kathleen Eagle 11/93
* Drums of Autumn by Diana Gabaldon
* Heaven Above by Sara Jarrod 9/96
* Caroline & the Raider by Linda Lael Miller 3/92
* Skye O’Malley by Bertrice Small
* Sunset Embrace by Sandra Brown
* Hawk O’Toole’s Hostage by Sandra Brown
* The Shattered Rose by Jo Beverley
* Silver Flame buy Susan Johnson
* Night in Eden by Candice Proctor
* Between Friends by Candace Spencer
* Tender Trap by Beverly Barton 1/97
* Tangled by Mary Balogh 3/94

I have never read Kathleen Eagle, Diana Gabaldon, Jo Beverley or Candace Spencer. The Sara Jarrod book I have read in its redone form as an EC novel (more on that later). The Sandra Brown book I think is the one I am scared to read. And I haven’t read Hawk O’Toole’s Hostage (although I think I have it). Silver Flame and Night in Eden I have read but breastfeeding sex doesn’t ring a bell at all. Maybe I didn’t even notice? And I have Tangled but don’t think I have read it.

Any others that anyone can think of? Have you read any of these books? Did you find them squicky? Do you even remember there being breastfeeding sex?

Would this make you put the book down and walk away? Would you just skip over the scene? Or would you not even notice it?

Just a Little Patience
If You Can’t Take the Heat

My take on Passion was a largely favorable one. I liked it. With each reread, I liked it more.

But one thing I noticed she seemed to get too involved with the discussions on message boards. As a reader I like talking about books with the authors. Yes shocking I know *g*. But there gets to be that point where you agree to disagree because you are repeating yourself.

I think this is a common first time author mistake. You want to talk about your baby. You want people to love your baby. You want people to read your baby! But it is murky water. How much is too much. Where is it okay to post? What will increase conversation? What will be a thread killer?

And I think you learn as you go. Yes there are authors… many many authors who will give you advice. Listen to you bitch. Dry your tears. And help you call those reviewers bitches! But much like your mother telling you to do things… you still have to learn on your own.

Which is what *I* think happened with Lisa Valdez and her experience with Message Boards. (please correct me if I am wrong lisa)

Message boards and reviews are what they are, reader opinion. They are not for the weak. Some are great, some are grand, some are wonderful and some will tell you sucks serious ass (or even great big hairy donkey balls).

So in that case… I would have to say I agree with Sandy (a reviewer with AAR) in her post Is she a grown-up or not?

I personally thought that she spent a bit too much time feelin’ and basking in the love here. I guess she also felt the sting.

Well I would agree if that was what I thought Lisa Valdez’s point was in her post. I took it like Meljean did:

she was simply responding to her readers, who were wondering why the book was late, and responding in an honest (and I imagine somewhat embarrassing) manner. How mortifying is it to acknowledge that you let others opinions come between you and your work?

There was no complaint. She said: this was my reaction, and I’ve learned from it — and my book is late, yes, but I’ve moved on.

So putting reviews and message boards aside and focusing on ‘Hate Mail’ I can understand why Lisa had some problems with it. Why would a person feel the need to write an author and tell them how horrid, bad, filthy, wrong, fucked up, name your shit here – their book is?

That seems some what stalkerish. Reviews are for readers. Blogs and message boards are for discussion. And if an author ASKS you… what did you think. Well email the hell out of them.

But what drives someone to email some stranger and tell them they are fucked?

And what makes it okay? Just because as sandy sez:

I’m sorry that you think I’m being harsh. I think I’m just expecting Ms. Valdez to be a professional.

Hate mail is a bitch. But complain to your writer’s loops — Ms. Valdez was hardly blazing a trail here, they’ve all gotten hate mail before. Complain to your editor and your agent. They’re there to support you.

Clearly, Kristie J, her explanation was enough for you. But while I wouldn’t call you a patsy for your position, you seem to have no problem calling my earlier post superior. And, honestly, that’s kind of insulting.

But I’m a big girl. I’ll smile and suck it up and move on. I respect you and have always respected you, Krisitie (SIC) J, but I think we’ll have to agree to disagree here.

It happens to everyone so authors should just get over it? How do authors feel about it? Is it really something that common? How do you deal with it? Will anyone else admit to it *g*.

What makes an email turn from Feedback to Hate Mail? And anyone who has ever sent negative feedback to an author they didn’t know, what made you do it? What caused that reaction?

And hey if nothing else… if a person hates a book enough to feel the need to email, couldn’t you say you still did a good job as a writer?

At the heart of it. Like it or not, there is no right or wrong answer as far as Lisa Valdez’s post goes. It is how she felt. It is what she did to take care of what she saw as a problem. And I for one appreciate an author being honest. No matter if I agree or no.

Maybe that is just me…

And this is always fun:
You ARE what you WRITE

From Rod Stewart to Guns and Roses… earworms for everyone! hee sorry- syb

UPDATE: Do note the letter posted below is in regards to the first delay. Patience wasn’t published in May 2007 and current doesn’t have a release date but is set to be published.

After gentle nudging *g* Lisa Valdez has been kind enough to answer my question… where the heck is patience and what is taking so long!

Hi Everyone,

Sybil was kind enough to invite me to her blog so that I could have the opportunity to explain what the heck my problem has been with completing PATIENCE. Thank you, Syb, for this opportunity.

So, here’s the deal: This past year has been really challenging for me. Besides some very heavy intrusions by life, the biggest problem I had with writing PATIENCE was that I was writing it while dealing with the unexpectedly strong response to PASSION. As many of you may know, readers were very vocal about PASSION and they basically fell into two camps – those who adored it and those who despised it. There was very little in-between. And while many of the discussion boards were taken up with long threads about PASSION, my email was also overflowing. Most of the email was wonderful, and some of you made me cry (((hugs))), but there was also “hate mail,” which I could never identify until I’d started reading… and like the compulsion I often feel to watch a bad movie till the end, I had to read those emails to the end. I know, so stupid! Anyway, the force of these two opposing opinions came down on me together and, suddenly, writing got really difficult.

All at once, I felt a HUGE responsibility to all of you who had loved and adored PASSION. While I was so grateful that PASSION had fallen into your hands, I began to worry that you wouldn’t like Patience and Matthew’s story. I mean, they are very different characters from Passion and Mark, and the sensual angle is different as well. Perhaps, thought I, you just want another PASSION. And while I was tormenting myself with these thoughts, I did a completely ludicrous thing. I allowed the voices of my detractors to influence me as well. Lord, I kept thinking: if they hated PASSION, they’re going to stone me in the streets for PATIENCE. I started holding the characters back. I wouldn’t let them do what they wanted to do, or even think what they wanted to think. And when I did give them some leeway, I did so only with the greatest trepidation.

But I don’t want to give the impression that I am this over-sensitive, delicate type, with fragile confidence and flimsy sensibilities. I assure you, that’s not me. It went more like this: I wake up excited to write this scene in which Matthew gives Patience this intense spanking that breaks down all her emotional barriers. But, as is my habit, I check my email before I begin to write. Well, there in my inbox is an email from a very angry reader. She calls me a misogynist and rants that I have no business writing romance for women as I so obviously hate women. She goes on to say that Mark is an “abusive rapist,” (I didn’t know there was any other kind) and that Matthew is equally as bad as he “beats” his mother. She ends her email by calling me a “disgrace to modern women.” – Okay, so suffice it to say, I did not write the spanking scene that day. Nor did I write it for many days after. Then, after more garbage came my way, I opted not to write it at all… even though it was a major turning point in the story. And that’s how it went.

Well, you absolutely CANNOT write a book while afraid of it (especially a book like PATIENCE). You cannot! The manuscript was tepid, and half-hearted. And because I had left things out that I had suddenly feared readers would find too intense, Patience couldn’t even really arc as a character. I had completely robbed her of what she needed. And poor Matthew… I had cut him off at the knees as well.

Anyway, slowly but surely, I began to face the fact that I had completely lost my way. There were many months of denial before I was able to finally face the truth – that I’d allowed some very sad, unfortunate people to crush me. This was a rather disturbing and painful realization. I mean, how could I have let that happen? But I also got angry about it and, finally, I had this “what-the-heck?/what-is-your-problem?” moment. And in that moment (or two), I got so fed up with myself and the whole situation that I knew I was done. And within a week or two, I felt like myself again… thank you, Jesus!

So, having said all this, I apologize to all of you who loved PASSION and were generous enough to take time out of your busy lives to tell me so. I ought to have given you more of my trust. I ought to have trusted, as I did with PASSION, that if I loved these characters enough then many of you would too. And most of all, I ought not to have dishonored all of you, and myself, by allowing people who hate what I do to influence what I do.

So, there you have it… the cliff notes to a very long and surprisingly intense personal struggle. I hope you’ll all hang in there for Matthew and Patience’s romance. I know I’ve tried your patience at this point, but I also know that the book coming out in May is far more passionate and honest than the one you would have purchased earlier. Thanks so much for listening. And thank you, Syb, for offering me the welcoming forum of your blog.

Ciao,
Lisa
Oh, and the spanking scenes are back! Yeah, there are more than one…

So there is a nifty thread at AAR (really need to update links and put one up so I can stop looking for the link every time I mention it.

thread started by trish in the review board aka off limits to sybil

so here we be

I think Lisa Valdez makes a common first time author mistake in responding to much on the board. Not to say I don’t think an author should post on the review board, I do but I don’t think should post too much to take away from the reader discussion. That prolly makes no sense.

Although I do have to say I like what she said and even if I hadn’t liked Passion I would want to buy the next book because of how well she handed the board.

Funny enough I didn’t make it too far in the thread.

Anyway… check out the book, check out the thread

Lea Hensley’s review of Passion at AAR is pretty on spot with what I thought.

I would rate it more of an A or at least a B+ than I would a B but I still have trouble with the whole grade thang.

I was surprised at how much I enjoyed the story. For a first time author, trying her hand at a romance with a heavy touch of sex thrown in the mix, Lisa Valdez does really well. I would say she is sort of a mix of emma holly and (older) susan johnson. The heroine’s name is Passion, which I had a eh moment with, but I got over it quickly.

Lea does a great summary so I won’t redo it, just follow the link .

I still don’t get the screen thing, they are in a furniture room at the Crystal Palace going at it like bunnies behind a screen. How can people not hear something…

I really enjoyed Mark and Passion’s story and look forward Patience the next story in the trilogy.

A word of warning the love scenes are graphic with cocks and cunts aplenty and it can be slightly purple but not in a bad way. Mark loves Passion and once he knows it, he isn’t afraid to tell her. The sex, the plot and the character development all mix together well and make for a pretty tight story.

Someone had asked, What is Purple. I think LLB says it best here