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Wendy the Super Librarian‘s review of The Earl Takes a Lover by Georgia E. Jones
Historical erotica digital short story published by Spice Briefs 01 Jul 11

I’m a sucker for historicals with an erotic edge, so whenever I see one pop up in the Spice Briefs line, I always take a closer look.  Georgia E. Jones is a writer I’ve never read before, and the back cover blurb sounded enticing, so I gave it a whirl.  I wish I could say I fell madly in love – but sadly, not so much.

Penelope Montague makes her way in the world as a companion for an elderly lady.  Educated in a convent, what nobody is aware of is that young Penelope is the daughter of a prostitute and, for the first few years of her life, was raised in a brothel!  Not only that, she’s the author of the scandalous A Woman’s Handbook, which has ladies in a swoon and gentlemen in a lather.

It’s in her duties as a companion that she meets the new Earl of Thanet, Robin Sackville Tufton.  Robin is a rake of the first order, but now that he has inherited the title he finds himself thwarting off various matchmaking mamas.  When he spies Penelope, he knows that he must have her.  But what will happen when he discovers one taste is not enough?  As an Earl, Penelope is so far beneath him she might as well be hanging out with The Mole People.  And sure as shootin’, she ain’t content to be no man’s mistress.

While the sexy times were certainly sizzling, everything else about this story didn’t work for me.  While born to a prostitute and raised in a brothel, Penelope is still, conveniently, a virgin. Frankly, this smacked of the author wanting to have her cake and eat it too.  Especially since Penelope apparently “knows” enough about Sexy Times to write a book, but not enough so that Robin can still “educate” her.  Bah humbug.  We’re also to believe that when the patrons of said brothel begin to take notice of young Penelope, the madam ships her off to convent school.  OK, I’m calling shenanigans on this one.  What self-respecting madam in early 19th century London is going to ship off a potential money-making bonanza?  No hooker has a heart of gold that pure, let alone a madam who is, (hello?!) essentially, a pimp.  Don’t they kick you out of the Big Pimpin’ Union for that sort of thing?

Even if you’re willing to roll with Penelope’s background, there’s the small matter of the ending.  Um, there isn’t one.  This story just stops.  The resolution to the conflict?  Yeah, there isn’t any.  It just….stops.  This might not be totally disconcerting in a straight-up erotic story, but I viewed more than one romance road sign over the course of my reading.  So to have things just….stop?  With no real resolution?  Frustrating doesn’t even begin to cover it.  Bah humbug indeed.

Wendy TSLGrade: D

Summary:

London, 1801

No one could have guessed that virginal companion Penelope Montague is the author of the scandalous manual A Woman’s Handbook. Society believes she was educated in a convent, unaware she spent the first half of her life raised by the ladies of the famous Black Swan brothel.

Only rake Robin Sackville Tufton, Earl of Thanet, sees the sensual woman behind Pen’s proper exterior. From the moment he sees her, he wants her more than anything else. But Pen isn’t fit to be an earl’s wife, nor can he simply take her—despite her passionate response to his touch. Can Robin and Penelope rein in their desire…or will they find a way to indulge it?

No excerpt found.